Sometimes,I wondered why God fated me to be the first child in the family? Hello,I'm not complaining,I just wondering why? Tell me what you know about the term first child? You have to figure out how to become a role model and best example to your younger siblings by hitting every great expectations.
As if you know,most of my friends were like,they've got so many siblings above them,so many 'abang' and 'kakak'.I got so envious sometimes,like yeah,everything that you have to do is already done by your older siblings.So,you just sitting somewhere,doing nothing,instead of fulfilling your own needs and doing what you want to do.
That is my opinion.I'm just thinking that I have no enough qualities to be that kind of person but at the same time I feel,if there is no one take a step to make it happens,who else? In the name of God,I don't think it is a burden to me at all.However,the little things that will lead to life failure really make me so frustrated about my life.
I'm not willing to make my parents feeling down and upset.Before I die,I want to make them happy,I want to make them proud of me,I want to make a change,a really big one and I want to be the reason of every smiles on their faces.I really have to fight for everything,not only for my own sake,but for my family as well.Life can be so hard,sometimes.
Listen,some of you might not understand this,so I suggest you just can go fuck yourself somewhere.
3 comments:
I'm the eldest too. And boy, it's hard >.< You have to do the right things all the time. But it's also fun cause I'm the boss. :P
There are some things we wish we don't have to do. and wish we could fulfill. like making an expectation a reality. Chins up. Think positive. Be a good son, respect your parents and pray for them. That's enough.
My sister had this kind of feeling sometimes, and she always asked me to support her as the second one. Cause she knew that she's no perfect but for me the first child is very awesome and no one can replace them. FOREVER.Just like you m_m
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